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Why I Noped out of a F(Un) Conference
Jul. 20th, 2025 03:12 pmThis weekend, I requested off work, and got my tickets in the 15-minute window before they sold out, and went to the Rope F(un)conference.
We got there reasonably early, and I was quickly overwhelmed by the sounds of people talking to each other. People I know, and don't see very often, came up to me to talk to me, and I couldn't participate in the conversation, because I was overwhelmed by the general volume level and crowd. I could hear my friends, for the most part, I just wasn't comfortable talking, or even being, in that space .
Eventually the program got going, and it started with announcements about how we're going to do this conference and all that. And while all 70 odd of us were in one room quietly listening to one person talking at a time, I was okay. But as soon as everyone started talking to each other instead, and then when the conference broke up into the four simultaneous sessions, three of which were in one room, one of which was in its own room, I couldn't handle it .
I attended a first session in the large room with three simultaneous sessions, and there was music going on, and people in the other sessions talking, and I had a very hard time hearing the people in our session talking.
An Un-Conference is one where people don't design the sessions ahead of time, they make up the sessions at the moment, and anyone can present. Wasn't quite sure what rope-related subjects I could present on, but before the conference, I thought I could present a session on how to be a good audience member. Because, when I was a graduate student, I got really good at it: always come up with at least one good question, in case there's awkward silence when the presenter asks if anyone has any questions. Make sure that the questions you ask publicly are ones that are applicable to everyone, and not just you individually, and such like that.
But I didn't end up suggesting that topic, because I quickly realized that I was not going to be comfortable in this space, because it was so loud and simultaneous sessions were going to be so problematic.
Early in the pandemic, as a lot of people were super frustrated with how the time horizon kept getting pushed, forward and forward about when we were going to be able to get back to normal, I realized that I really preferred not having to go to crowded spaces. I have completely stopped going to bars, I try to only go to restaurants at times when they're not going to be busy, specifically have avoided all possible rope conferences and big parties, because they don't think I like being around lots of people at once, anymore.
I have certainly had fun at concerts and conferences and in crowded places in the past. But I've changed a lot over the years and I just don't know how to handle noisy crowded places. I just don't like them.
I'm thinking that maybe if I invest in some of those fancy active noise canceling headphones that are supposed to pick out conversation from the din, maybe I'd be more comfortable. I really do wish I could have continued to attend the unconference this weekend.
I'll continue to host small rope jams at my place and go to classes, and just continue to avoid crowded noisy places. It does make me feel more disabled or out of the norm than I've ever felt before, despite having glasses because of my seriously poor eye sight. I've always thought of myself as neurotypical, but I was being affected by the crowd noise in a way that a lot of neurospicy people say they experience. These types of crowded and noisy places really did not used to bother me like this.
We got there reasonably early, and I was quickly overwhelmed by the sounds of people talking to each other. People I know, and don't see very often, came up to me to talk to me, and I couldn't participate in the conversation, because I was overwhelmed by the general volume level and crowd. I could hear my friends, for the most part, I just wasn't comfortable talking, or even being, in that space .
Eventually the program got going, and it started with announcements about how we're going to do this conference and all that. And while all 70 odd of us were in one room quietly listening to one person talking at a time, I was okay. But as soon as everyone started talking to each other instead, and then when the conference broke up into the four simultaneous sessions, three of which were in one room, one of which was in its own room, I couldn't handle it .
I attended a first session in the large room with three simultaneous sessions, and there was music going on, and people in the other sessions talking, and I had a very hard time hearing the people in our session talking.
An Un-Conference is one where people don't design the sessions ahead of time, they make up the sessions at the moment, and anyone can present. Wasn't quite sure what rope-related subjects I could present on, but before the conference, I thought I could present a session on how to be a good audience member. Because, when I was a graduate student, I got really good at it: always come up with at least one good question, in case there's awkward silence when the presenter asks if anyone has any questions. Make sure that the questions you ask publicly are ones that are applicable to everyone, and not just you individually, and such like that.
But I didn't end up suggesting that topic, because I quickly realized that I was not going to be comfortable in this space, because it was so loud and simultaneous sessions were going to be so problematic.
Early in the pandemic, as a lot of people were super frustrated with how the time horizon kept getting pushed, forward and forward about when we were going to be able to get back to normal, I realized that I really preferred not having to go to crowded spaces. I have completely stopped going to bars, I try to only go to restaurants at times when they're not going to be busy, specifically have avoided all possible rope conferences and big parties, because they don't think I like being around lots of people at once, anymore.
I have certainly had fun at concerts and conferences and in crowded places in the past. But I've changed a lot over the years and I just don't know how to handle noisy crowded places. I just don't like them.
I'm thinking that maybe if I invest in some of those fancy active noise canceling headphones that are supposed to pick out conversation from the din, maybe I'd be more comfortable. I really do wish I could have continued to attend the unconference this weekend.
I'll continue to host small rope jams at my place and go to classes, and just continue to avoid crowded noisy places. It does make me feel more disabled or out of the norm than I've ever felt before, despite having glasses because of my seriously poor eye sight. I've always thought of myself as neurotypical, but I was being affected by the crowd noise in a way that a lot of neurospicy people say they experience. These types of crowded and noisy places really did not used to bother me like this.
